The Stages of Healing

A re-post from my darling, Shayne's blog as I find it very true. 

The Stages of Healing:

1. Denial. You try to bury your thoughts and feelings about those experiences.

2. Self-blame. You try to explain what happened to you two by assuming you were somehow responsible for the ending, decimating your self-esteem as you work overtime to convince yourself that you would not have been hurt if only you had done things differently.

3. Victim. In this stage, you realised that you did not deserve the hurt you received. You might wallow in self-pity, expect little of yourself or lash out at anyone who "crosses" us.

4. Indignation. Then you get angry at the people who hurt you and at the world. You want the people who hurt you to pay and to suffer as you had.

5. Survivor. Finally, at this stage, you recognised that although you were indeed hurt, you survived. The painful past experiences took things away from you but gave you things as well. You will become aware of your strengths and welcome the return of everything that matters other than the pain.
6. Integration. In this stage, you start to acknowledge that the people who hurt you may have been doing the best he could, too. With this knowledge, you will eventually put the past in perspective ,without forgetting it but letting go of the pain, and get on with your life, unencumbered by the emotional damage.

After one and a half month, currently at the fourth stage. Two more stages to go. 

Sometimes I ask myself is it too much to ask for to be happy. If so, I'll only ask to just feel okay again. I really want my life back. I don't want to spend all the nights thinking all things I could've been doing, with you. I'm so tired of wasting all my tears for something that is not coming back. I want to feel again. I want to smile like I really mean it. I want to laugh without having to force it. I want to live. 

"I accidentally fell in love and you intentionally broke my heart."